Reviewed by Gordon Atkinson

Barbara Brown Taylor is a beautiful writer. She has clarity, simplicity, and depth. She is also a beautiful thinker. And that shows in her writing as well. That's why I own every book she's ever written.

My reading has suffered since I began writing seriously. I have less energy for reading, so I am careful with my choices. I’ve been avoiding church books these days in favour of serious literature that feeds the writer in me. But when I saw that Taylor’s memoir was out, I had to have it.

Behold, here is a Barbara Brown Taylor that is new to me. She is very vulnerable in this book, confessing her motives and insecurities and allowing us to walk with her as she tries to deal with them. Her struggles are the classic struggles of every pastor. She worries about her power and how she uses it;  she worries about what people think of her; and she worries about her church and its identity. Most of all, she wonders how to maintain her own growing faith in the middle of working to support the faith of others.

Some may wonder why a seasoned minister like Taylor still struggles with these things. But I am an insecure minister myself. And I know what it is like to write with some sophistication, but still worry about what people think about you. I feel a kinship with her in this regard.

Ministers can feel dehumanized at times. This happens in part because we court our righteous image and in part because the people in the pews want to see nothing but our image. Taylor describes a church party where people were pushing each other into a pool. No one would push the minister in, of course, so there she stood watching everyone else in the water. But then someone gave her a shove and she found herself in the water with all the rest of us. I found myself struggling with tears as I thought about my own life and how many times I have wished I could be “a regular person.”

Barbara Brown Taylor left church to find her faith. Not THE Church, of course, but the little church, the shaky and wobbling shadow of The Church that is every local congregation. She left the centre of religion and moved to the wilderness, and there she found the presence of God had not left her after all.

I would say this to you. This is a book about leaving church. And if you never find a way to leave church, you might have a hard time finding God.

rlp

Gordon Atkinson is pastor of Covenant Baptist Church in San Antonio, Texas and has his own excellent website www.reallivepreacher.com.  We are most grateful to Gordon for his permission to reproduce his essays here.